Here’s a timely and refreshing counterpoint to the 24/7/365 media narrative that Americans are hopelessly divided. The Connection Opportunity, a two-year study by More In Common that involved more than 6,000 people across the United States, reveals that most Americans are not only open to connecting with others across lines of difference, they want to.

Yep – in contrast to the rage-bait in our feeds, the report identifies a country full of people who are eager for meaningful relationships, shared purpose, and honest dialogue. But crucially, it also pinpoints what’s standing in the way — and offers practical solutions.

According to the study:

›› 70% of Americans say they feel a responsibility to connect with people who are different from them.

›› 66% believe they can learn something valuable from those with differing perspectives.

›› 60% say the country would be stronger if we did a better job of working across lines of difference.

This desire is widespread, encompassing Americans across diverse demographics, including age, race, income, political affiliation, and geography. People don’t just tolerate differences — many actively crave spaces where they can engage across them, the report shows.

So why aren’t we connecting?

Simply put, a perceived lack of opportunity. Nearly half of the respondents reported not regularly encountering people with different backgrounds or beliefs. Others said they didn’t know how to start a connection or feared saying the wrong thing.

The report outlines four main barriers:

›› Lack of proximity or opportunity. Segregated social, political, and media bubbles limit exposure to differences.

›› Assumptions about others. Many believe people on “the other side” are uninterested or hostile.

›› Social norms. In many communities, it’s not expected, or even encouraged, to reach across lines.

›› Fear and anxiety. A significant number fear they’ll be judged, misunderstood, or even physically threatened.

Interestingly, while people are more comfortable connecting across racial, cultural, and generational lines, the most fraught barrier is political. The study found that Americans experience the most anxiety and the least opportunity to engage with someone who holds a different political view.

What encourages connection?

Two key predictors emerged:

›› Norms. When people believe their community values connection across differences, they are far more likely to engage themselves. Peer modeling, local leadership, and visible practices of bridging all matter.

›› Lower anxiety. Reducing the perceived risk of awkwardness, offense, or conflict is essential. This includes clear expectations, structured activities, and reassuring framing that allows people to ease into it.

People are more likely to form connections when they share a common goal, have repeated exposure to one another, and experience guided interaction, like through a community project or volunteer group. Mere proximity isn’t enough; intentional design matters.

Practical steps to build connection

The report offers specific, tangible strategies to reverse our “connection recession.” These include:

›› Creating third spaces. Invest in and maintain physical spaces, such as community centers, public parks, and libraries, that foster casual, low-stakes interactions. The study shows that these spaces are key in cultivating connection, especially for those without institutional ties, such as a workplace or faith community.

›› Design shared goals. Collaborative efforts, such as neighborhood clean-ups, mutual aid, or school volunteering, bring diverse groups together around a purpose larger than their identities.

›› Shift social norms. Leaders, both formal and informal, can make a big difference by modeling curiosity, respect, and bridge-building. Highlight stories of connection. Make it normal to connect.

›› Reduce intergroup anxiety. Host structured dialogues, guided listening sessions, or co-learning experiences. When expectations are clear and participants are supported, fear of “messing up” diminishes.

›› Measure and invest in social infrastructure. Policymakers and funders should treat social cohesion as seriously as physical infrastructure. Local and national initiatives can prioritize investment in connection as a public good.

Here’s our chance

The Connection Opportunity doesn’t sugarcoat America’s divisions. But it doesn’t exaggerate them, either. It shows a population eager for solidarity, stymied more by structural and cultural headwinds than outright hostility. In other words, the gap between interest and action is vast, but not insurmountable.

In this moment, those who are ready to lead with empathy and creativity have a real chance to shape a different future. Whether in our neighborhoods, workplaces, places of worship, or civic life, we can help close the gap between intention and opportunity.

If you’re interested in exploring in more detail, we encourage you to read the full report here.